# 04 How To Own Things *Week 1, Day 3 of [[00 The Wealthy Stoic Course]]* #source/course << [[03 The Two Ways To Get Rich|Back]] | [[05 The Definition of Wealth is 'Enough'|Next]] >>  ## Content It was the experience of having been deprived of so much that formed Epictetus’ detachment from worldly possessions. It was as if he said to himself, “No one will ever take anything from me again.” One evening a thief entered Epictetus’ home and stole an iron lamp* that he kept burning in his front hallway. While he felt a flash of disappointment and anger, he paused, checked himself, and found a different way through the experience of being robbed. “I reasoned that the thief who took it must have felt an impulse he couldn’t resist,” Epictetus recalled. “So I said to myself, ‘Tomorrow you’ll get a cheaper, less attractive lamp made of clay.’ A man only loses what he has.” Is the lesson here that we should welcome thieves into our homes? Or that we should only possess cheap stuff?  Of course not. Of course not. The Stoics would say we should **enjoy what we own but that our happiness shouldn’t be tied to what we own**. “Accept prosperity with appreciation and moderation,” Seneca would write. But…“persuade yourself that you can live happily without it as well as with it.” The comedian and car collector Jerry Seinfeld was asked if he’s thought about what will happen with all of his expensive cars after he dies. “Sure,” he said. “My wife’s going to liquidate it, and that’s fine with me. I want people like me to enjoy them. It should be like blowing on a dandelion.” This is how we must treat our possessions. Enjoy them. But be able to live just as happily without them. Hold them with appreciation and let them go without attachment. Like blowing on a dandelion. You can only lose what you have. You don’t control your possessions, so don’t ascribe more value to them than they deserve. _*It says something about the fame of this frugal teacher that after his death, an admirer—who clearly didn’t mind having something that could be taken from him—would purchase Epictetus’ earthen lamp for three thousand drachmas._ --- ## Workshop **What is your lamp?** Have you noticed that you treat your possessions to have more value than they really do? Is there a mindset change that could occur to help with your "stolen lamp"? Why do you hold onto your possessions as much as you do?